August 3, 2010

ten thoughts in my head

1. I'm glad to have a job I generally enjoy and feel successful at, but sad that tomorrow my vacation ends and I have to go back to working for my monthly paychecks. Why can't they just send me my monthly paychecks without me having to go to work? I would continue to generally enjoy and feel successful at this job, and be glad to have it, and also I'd feel so much better rested. And my laundry would be folded and put away much more consistently.

   2. I saw INCEPTION yesterday and now I want to be a dream weaver, but only if Leonardo Dicaprio can be my sidekick. He has nice eyes, and I can't find one single example on the internet of where he's acted like a diva to any of his fans. Though I can find at least 30 various examples of his fans acting like divas toward him.

3. I also really like these actresses: Patricia Clarkson, Kate Winslet, Julianne Moore, Meryl Streep, and Bryce Dallas Howard. I would like to invite them out for coffee, so we can talk about motherhood and the state of the world. I don't think Britney Spears would be a good coffee date. I think if Britney Spears came to have coffee with Patricia, Kate, Julianne, Bryce, Meryl, and me, we'd spend a lot of time cheering her up, and then we'd shake our heads after she left and wonder about her. 

4. I spent 15 seconds this morning de-bunking a crazy-making email my mother sent me about some cap and trade bill in Congress right now. This email claimed we'd all have to have house licenses to sell our homes in the future, and Obama was trying to control who can and can't sell a house. It turns out the cap and trade bill does not have anything in it about house selling licenses, and it's only encouraging homeowners to install energy saving devices in their homes on a voluntary basis, not forcing anybody to do anything. Because installing energy saving devices in your home will protect the environment and save you money.

The words "cap and trade" make my eyes glaze over.

5. Then I spent 20 minutes trying to understand the ton of tax hike and anti-health care reform information that was forwarded to her. She's terrified after reading this, and I can see why: just a load of confusing words with no unbiased resources to back up anything that's in the email. And it's all written in twisted, angry words meant to frighten and confuse.

Taxes and money talk make my eyes glaze over. But I know twisted, angry writing when I see it, and I think as soon as Congress gets done taxing the poor and middle class and helping the rich, they should immediately outlaw twisted, angry writing in mass, forwarded emails.

6. Why is it so humid? WHY is it SO humid??

7. Did you know that Leonardo Dicaprio is only 5'11"? I really thought he was more like 6'1". There's a website HERE that debates how tall Leonardo Dicaprio is. It's really geeky.

8. One of our neighbors drives a school bus. Today, C and I went out for lunch. We saw our school bus neighbor eating lunch with some of his bus driver friends in the booth across from us. He was really excited about being awarded the Math Institute route this year--he gets to drive the math geeks to and from school every afternoon. I wondered if some of them ever argue about how tall celebrities are, on the internet.

Then I found THIS place and realized: nah.

9. I wish I had a really important, deeply wise, insanely helpful tip on motherhood to put here. A tip that would make this blog go viral, and maybe I could mass produce some t-shirts with my insanely helpful, deeply wise, really important mothering logo-tip on them that would put about $500,000 in my bank account. The government (according to my mother's crazy emails) would take 75% of this, which would still leave me with $250,000. I would pay off my house with that money. And get fresh highlights on my hair.

10. Right now, it's 4 PM. In 4 more hours Melissa will be taking a bath and going to bed. And then so will I. In 14 hours I will be cruelly woken up by an alarm, and will begin another school year. It's always a process, the beginning and ending of a school year. It's the middle that counts the most, I think.

Must remember this thought in 14 hours.


  1. I would just like to note that $250,000 is NOT 75% of $500,000. I did that on purpose. To prove I'm not a math geek, just a geek in general, who doesn't know what 75% of $500,000 is.

  2. Oooh, happy new school year. We have a few weeks yet. I am working some days in August - committee work, etc., but no kids 'til after Labor Day.
    Wishing you super cute students.


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